oh, the wonderful things you find on the interwebz (no, really)

i find things when i play online. and since i really liked this.... here ya go, lovely readers.


"Dear Future Boyfriend,

I hope you will be my special someone.
Someone who will be cute with me.
Someone who will lay in bed with me all day.
Someone that doesn’t mind kissing a lot.
Someone who likes to watch movies.
Someone who likes to go out.
Someone that likes going to park and getting on the swings.
Someone who will hold my hand whenever we go somewhere.
Someone who isn’t afraid to be downright goofy.
Someone who likes to have pillow fights, tickle fights and paint fights.
Someone who won’t judge me from my past mistakes.
Someone who isn’t afraid to be with me.
Someone who isn’t afraid to love me, for me.

Love,
Me."

Pretty sure that's my current boyfriend <3

my father's daughter

if there is one thing that i inherited from my father, other than the thick hair and my "character building" nose, it's my temper.

{warning - this post is going to contain foul language. i'm sorry, but it does.}
 
the absolute fucking LAST thing i would ever want to inherit from him. my dad's temper is horrible. dealing with my dad's temper has made mine even worse. i despise my temper. i hate it with a burning passion.

i have friends who joke that i must be italian, because i have the temper of a woman from naples. it takes little to get me to start talking smack, and a little more to where it's hard to stop my reflex to hit/kick/scratch/bite someone. i've also had a (guy) friend joke that violence is my way of showing affection.

i really wish that wasn't true. it really is one of my ways of showing affection, unfortunately.

my old softball coach used to purposefully piss me off to get me to play harder. my director pissed me off to get me to act harder, sing louder. and it pissed me off even more because i knew what they were doing and that they were using my weakness, and pissed me off even MORE that it worked!


but what's even worse is that the people i love the most are the ones who most easily trigger that horrible beast. my mom and my dad both can get it going in two nanoseconds (sorry, mamacita, but it's true), and the boy and i never fought, not even once. raphael and i fought tooth and nail 24/7 - we haven't spoken for two years and he is still one of my best friends. and oh, honeybee, sweetheart... you get that temper going preeeeeetty badly.

i'm so sorry for today D:

luckily, at some point my temper lets me think clearer and concentrate so much better so that i can figure out a solution.

which happened today.

thank god.


i just hate feeling like a total bitch towards people :(


hopefully tomorrow will be better :D

oh. and this is my desktop background on my laptop right now. i just felt like sharing the cuteness with the world :::

 

last day of summer

the end of summer is typically a solemn affair. the air gets chillier, and the carefree days of flip-flops and bikinis start to disappear....

but the end of summer leads to my absolute favorite season, FALL. 

it might be because i'm a november's child, or it could be my dislike for extreme temperatures, or maybe even my near-addiction to school supplies. either way, i really love fall.

but i can already feel that this is going to be my best school year yet. i'm actually EXCITED for the first day of school tomorrow. why?

1. this year is actually going to be a challenge for me, courseload wise. i'm typically the girl in the corner who's writing or, i'll admit that i've done this on occasion, texting because her work is done while everyone else is still talking and working. not only am i taking the hardest english class offered for juniors at my school, i'm also taking spanish iii, chemistry, trigonometry, and economics. all of which are college prep. i actually asked for a study hall this year because of it (though i will probably be a student aid for my favoritestestest theatre teacher <3)
2. i no longer have the same homeroom as my freshman and sophomore years. which means i will probably not have to deal with the boy AT ALL this year. i'm sad that Mme. Hanks is gone, but.... i can totally make this work for me.
3. my english class is going to be, 'scuse my french, BAD ASS. some of my faaaaaaaaaaaaavorite people are in there (mackenzie, manser, nikita, i'm lookin' at YOU!). plus, again, it will be a challenge.
4. i'm taking yearbook. they cut my web design class *sob* but i'm still in yearbook. which i also have with mackenzie. my inner computer nerd is *squee*-ing her little heart out in her pigtails and geeky-chic glasses.
5. i have lunch with my boyfriend.

that last thing makes me the happiest girl in the world. because, while he's in a more difficult math than me (i could have chose pre-cal. i so could have. trig's easier though.) none of our classes would have matched up (trust me, i tried with the theatre arts classes. i tried. i just couldn't make it work.) because we're in different grades. so having lunch together seems like a total blessing.


so, i am a very happy girl right now and may or may not be pampering myself before i have to wake up at five a.m. tomorrow morning.

i <3 socially awkward penguin. and this went along with school starting :P

junior year = amazing.

an award

Confession time!

I can be a real, true, unlike any other, witch with a capital B sometimes. Part of it is probably because I sort of have a princess complex. Part of it is probably because I grew up in an all girl household for all of my life except for every other weekend and a week every summer. I will whine and complain on a GOOD DAY. On a bad day? Well, anyone who deals with me deserves sainthood.

Allow me to explain the context for this post.

While I'm a writer, I struggle with English. I admit it.

I STRUGGLE WITH ENGLISH.

And don't even get me started on summer reading.

Even if it's something I might otherwise enjoy, if I sense the impending DOOM of having to dissect every little thing about a poem or a novel or an article, my attention span is the length of my cat's attention span. As soon as something stops moving, I space out. And it's not like dissecting pieces of work is HARD for me to do - it's a piece of my stepmom's carrot cake with cream cheese icing {I need to stop distracting myself....}. But because my attention span is about 4 seconds long and not only am I a perfectionist, but also a procrastinator, I get stressed out. And then I get grumpy. And the only way I can be soothed is with sweet words and chocolate and cute animals and websites like HelloGiggles and filleosophy.

This is also why I can crank out a perfect essay the night before it's due after a breakdown of some sort EVERY TIME. Some have even dared to call me a stress addict. It gets that adrenaline goin' and BAM! I'm back in action.

But, unfortunately, this means people I care about (or just anyone I talk to while I'm going through this mega-stress) get stressed out too. Which I feel bad for.

Which is EXACTLY why my boyfriend should win an award for dealing with me today. Yes, it's distance dealing with me via text, but he still should win an award.

{Yes, Mom. You get an award too because you have to deal with me 24/7 whenever I'm like this and you're usually the cause of my breakdowns ----- THANK YOU for that, by the way. You kick my butt and it's always just what I need to get back on track.}

ANYWAYS....

That's why you get these the next time I make them :) [side note: who knows when that might be, but you'll get them. At some point. I hope.]

So thank you for putting up with me and all my grumpy-psychoticness. Mwah. You're the best :)